Grit in Children: How Parents Can Help Kids Build Resilience and Perseverance

By Dr. Devon Redmond, Modern Psychology

As parents, one of the most valuable traits we can nurture in our children is grit, or the ability to persevere and stay motivated in the face of challenges. Psychologist Angela Duckworth, who popularized the concept of grit in her bestselling book Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, defines grit as the combination of passion and persistence over the long term. Research shows that grit is often a stronger predictor of success than IQ or natural ability.

Similarly, psychologist Carol Dweck’s work on growth mindset highlights that children who believe abilities can be developed through effort and learning are more likely to take on challenges, bounce back from setbacks, and show grit when things get hard.

So, how can parents help foster grit in their children?

Why Grit Matters for Kids

Grit helps children:

• Keep going when tasks get difficult (like sticking with a tough math problem).

• Develop resilience when facing setbacks or disappointments.

• Build confidence through the process of effort and practice.

• Achieve long-term goals, whether in academics, sports, arts, or personal growth.

Teaching grit doesn’t mean pushing children relentlessly or expecting perfection. Instead, it’s about helping kids understand that effort and persistence matter as much, if not more, than innate talent.

Tips for Parents to Foster Grit in Children

1. Model Perseverance Yourself

Children learn by watching. Share with your kids the times you struggled, kept going, and eventually improved. Let them see that setbacks are normal and persistence pays off.

2. Praise Effort, Not Just Results

Drawing from Carol Dweck’s growth mindset research, praise your child for hard work, problem-solving, and persistence, rather than only for being “smart” or “talented.” For example:

• Instead of: “You’re so good at math!”

• Try: “I’m proud of how you kept working through that tough problem.”

3. Encourage Long-Term Commitments

Angela Duckworth’s research shows that grit is built by sticking with something meaningful over time. Encourage your child to commit to a sport, hobby, or activity for a full season or year, even when it gets hard.

4. Normalize Struggle and Failure

Remind your child that mistakes and challenges are part of learning. Share examples of successful people who faced failure before achieving their goals. This helps children see that setbacks are stepping stones, not dead ends.

5. Teach the “Yet” Mindset

Carol Dweck suggests adding the word yet when children say, “I can’t do this.”

• “I can’t solve this problem… yet.”

• “I can’t ride my bike without training wheels… yet.”

That one small word shifts the focus from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset, encouraging perseverance.

6. Break Big Goals Into Smaller Steps

Children can get overwhelmed by large tasks. Teach them to set manageable goals and celebrate progress along the way. This builds both confidence and endurance.

Final Thoughts

Grit doesn’t mean never struggling or never giving up; it means learning to stick with challenges, recover from setbacks, and keep moving forward with purpose. By modeling persistence, encouraging effort, and cultivating a growth mindset, parents can help their children develop grit and resilience that will serve them well throughout their lives.

If you’d like personalized strategies for supporting your child’s emotional resilience and growth, therapy can provide guidance tailored to your family’s needs.