The Hidden Role of Avoidance in Anxiety: Why Stepping Back Often Makes Things Worse

By Dr. Devon Redmond, Licensed Psychologist

Anxiety is uncomfortable, sometimes intensely so. When something stirs fear, worry, or overwhelm, the most natural response is to pull away from it. Don’t volunteer to offer the presentation. Skip the phone call. Put off the difficult conversation. Stay home instead of going to the event.  Scroll on your phone instead of studying.

In the moment, avoidance brings immediate relief. But in the long term, it often plays a central role in maintaining or worsening anxiety symptoms. Understanding this cycle is a crucial step toward effective anxiety treatment and lasting change.

Why Avoidance Feels Helpful (At First)

Avoidance is one of the brain’s oldest survival tools. If something feels threatening, stepping away reduces distress and prevents immediate discomfort (and when you’re in actual danger, helps you stay safe). That moment of relief sends a powerful message to the brain:

“Good job! You escaped. Do that again next time.”

This reward strengthens the habit. The more someone avoids, the more their mind learns that the avoided situation must be dangerous, reinforcing the cycle.

How Avoidance Maintains Anxiety

1. Avoidance prevents new learning.

Anxiety thrives on uncertainty: What if this goes wrong? What if I can’t handle it?
When someone avoids a feared situation, they never gather new evidence, like the possibility that the situation may actually be manageable or less threatening than expected. This becomes a major area of focus in CBT for anxiety, where clients learn to build new experiences that counter anxious predictions.

2. The brain becomes more sensitive over time.

With repeated avoidance behaviors, the brain becomes increasingly convinced that the situation is dangerous. Anxiety grows, not because the world has changed, but because avoidance has trained the brain to expect threat.

3. Life narrows.

Avoidance shrinks a person’s world. Social invitations may be turned down, opportunities at work avoided, and routines become restricted. Over time, this leads to more stress and fewer positive experiences, fueling mental health symptoms.

4. Short-term relief masks long-term costs.

Avoidance is like taking pain medication for a broken bone without treating the underlying injury. The immediate relief feels helpful, but the core issue remains, and often gets worse without dealing with the issue.

Approach, Not Avoidance: A Core Principle of Anxiety Therapy

Evidence-based treatments such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) emphasize gradually approaching situations that anxiety encourages people to avoid.

How approaching helps:

• It teaches the brain that the feared situation is safer than expected.

• Confidence grows as people discover they can tolerate discomfort.

• Anxiety decreases over time because avoidance no longer reinforces it.

• Life expands, allowing for more meaning, engagement, and connection.

This approach is central to work with a psychologist who specializes in anxiety disorders.

Self-Compassion Matters

Avoidance isn’t a sign of weakness, it is a natural response to distress, and many people don’t even realize how often they engage in avoidance behaviors. Noticing avoidance patterns is an important part of understanding anxiety. Making small, intentional steps toward situations that feel uncomfortable can gradually build confidence and flexibility over time.

If Anxiety Is Shrinking Your Life, Support Is Available

If avoidance and anxiety are impacting your daily functioning or quality of life, professional help can make a significant difference. Working with a licensed psychologist or anxiety therapist can help you build skills, face what’s difficult, and reduce anxiety over time.

If you’re ready to explore anxiety treatment, we’re here to help you take the first step.